SHOULD A LADY MAKE THE FIRST MOVE ON A FELLA?
May 24, 2012 § 1 Comment
I was asked this question by a female just over a week ago and the way I answered it made me feel that it deserved a blog post ha ha…
Before you read this blog, if you are thinking about making moves on a guy in the club, getting yourself a sugar daddy or just for casual sexual encounters, you might as well evaporate from this page right about now as it is not the context we are looking at. Many Thanks 🙂
This is a question with no definite answer, however, the views that you will read will surely spark a reasonable and well detailed stand point for future reference.
In the case of a woman making the first move on a guy, the premier issue that should be addressed is what ‘making a move is’ in this context…
‘Making a move’ means asking a guy out, not solely for the purpose of having a date but in terms of looking for a partner to partake in a long term relationship AKA Marriage .
Now that this is clear, lets dive into a few of the points amongst many that was brought up in that discussion:
Making moves for a fella to notice you is not a taboo, however, how it is done might exposes you to a very high selection of consequences:
Lets bullet ’em out
– You lay yourself at the mercy of the maturity of the Fella: This means that you make yourself vulnerable to the guy’s decision making process. Hopefully the guy you approach is
1. Able to differentiate between his real desires and carnal desires
2. Able to be honest to tell you up front
3. Able to not be a coward; i.e. leading you on to let you down for his own ‘supposed gain’
Now, these are just a few of the ‘Ables’ you hope he is able to do.
On that note, on to the next point…
– You appear desperate, and speaking for my species as men, ‘we don’t anticipate such a trait in our potential take home to Momma woman’ but rather want her to be a diamond in the dirt. i.e. he must feel like he has won her in a competition rather than been given a handout for taking second place.
– If he doesn’t make a move to get you, he probably isn’t gonna make a move to keep you when push comes to shove as the saying goes…. “easy come … easy go”… and so if you come easy, might end up leaving easier.
– A well balanced and matured fella knows what he wants and goes for it; if he does not go for you in due course, it could be 1 of 2 things
1. He doesn’t want you; so taking us back to point 1 on the hopes of the ‘Ables’
2. Or doesn’t know what he wants; very very dangerous! as in the long run, this indecisive trait would manifest in the future question by the lady who made the move:
” why do men cheat?” ANSWER: “HE DID NOT KNOW WHAT HE WANTED WHEN YOU MADE THE MOVE!!!” end of!
However, pros are bound to be there, but from the conversation I had, they were hard to come by. But here is one for the record.
– You put yourself on his radar (that’s all I can think of): that is pretty much the only pro I could think of when I gave my ‘balanced out of balanced percepective’ 😀 . But this could be a strong Pro, as some guys are sometimes just too oblivious, or as we will rather like to say, focused! 😛
But when you do so, please do it with caution!!!
Don’t act desperate, I REPEAT!!! DON’T ACT DESPERATE!
We shall talk about how not to act desperate in a later post.
On that amazing note, this definitely scratches the top of the surface and is nowhere close to as in depth as this topic went and could go. So please, do not base this as fact but just as a framework for further discussions. Watch this beauty of a space famalams 😉
Till then, lets tune it up 2ice as nice!!!